You are right. I am dark. Dark in thought and dark in speech. There are reasons for this. Depression. Introspection. Lack of social awareness. Cynical and pessimistic attitude. More likely the issue is bi-polar disorder. Mood swings. Not sure I have it, but something is there. Also, alcohol is a problem. Can't stay away from it and really want nothing to do with it. Want help, but you try finding groups that don't have a path that leads to God. It's tough. So internalize away. Prepare yourself of a lifetime of this, but know that there will be good times along the way.
It just sits there below the surface. Doubt. It manifests itself in slow speech pattern. Shyness. Inability to hold small conversations. Troubling.
Baby learns all about herself as she walks away from her lead. Science should be the only thing we look to. Not a higher calling. Scientific proof of actuality. Scientific proof first hand that can be replicated and not exist as one-offs.
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