Finding Bigfoot = Gilligan's Island

I started watching this show, Finding Bigfoot, when it began. Intrigued many times by tales of the unknown (Well, except for the JFK conspiracies and the Art Bell show. But can you blame me? That's good radio), but never fully buying in, I've come to make this show a must watch each week. But I couldn't figure out why. Why was such bad television compelling? The same pretext (a photo or blurry video or dated memory) led the team to the sites and each episode contains a trip to the woods with no tangible results and ends with the same resolution - 'Well we may not have found anything, but you can't say we didn't tell a good story'. And as one of the hosts so succinctly put it, 'Just because there isn't any physical evidence to support what she saw doesn't mean that the experience didn't happen in her mind. And that's what is really important. We are validating that she did indeed have an experience. With what we can't really say, but something'

Or this exchange:
Present day 2011
[Host] Tell me what happened.
[storyteller - Man in his mid 40's] Well, I was riding my bike after dinner one night with my best friend from school... (And at this point, what? What 40 year old man goes out after dinner regularly and rides bikes with his best friend from school. Ok. I'll go with his. Small town. Possible that he has kept a friendship going that long. Please continue Mr. Storyteller]
...and we came around the corner. It was just about dusk and we saw this gigantic creature going through the garbage. We were scared so we got back on our bikes and headed home as fast as we....

(Ok. What? You are a 40 year old man and you see this giant animal going through people's garbage and you don't stay around to see what it is?. This is getting odd. Continue)
could.
[Host] And it was over by that tree there?
[storyteller] Actually no. The tree is long gone and the neighborhood has been built up. You have to remember this was 1974 and I was about 8 years old.

(Oh for fucks sake. This has got to be the worst..._)
And that's when it hit me what it was. A show I watched every afternoon after school. A show that was funny even without the laugh track. This show is Gilligan's island. Bigfoot is the rescue boat that they can never get. The people they meet each week are the celebrities who come to the island and the cast - really well picked.

Gilligan - Bobo obviously. A buffoon who contributes antics but little else. ..... Pals around with the Skipper, falls down, makes lots of noises and has a special hat that he wears in each episode.

The Professor - Renae. Critical, objective scientist who refuses to play along with the game and accept the numerous theories thrown out by the team. Offers a counterpoint but still can't figure out how to get off the island. Mostly because she likes what the island has to offer.

Ginger - Matt Moneymaker. The starlet, the one who everyone should look to. The Alpha in his mind. It's his group, his show and the show should revolve around him.

Mary Ann - Cliff. You really want to like this guy. You want to think he's different from Matt, he's humble and could be your next door neighbor. But he isn't. Same as Ginger just less overt.

The Howell's - The Producers putting this show together with all their money

The Skipper - The Seen but never mentioned extra cameramen always on each night trip and the editor in charge of designing the show. The Wizard of Oz if you will.

And the weapons. Why do they not carry a single munitions based weapon? You are in the woods hunting for an exotic mythical animal that may or may not be friendly. You offer yourself no protection in the event that it really doesn't want to shake your hand when it meets you but eat it instead. In this sense, they have crossed over into the Timothy Treadwell area and have no respect for boundaries. If they did, their night woods investigations would consist of two groups in tree stands making as little noise as possible, no walkie talkies and no leaving at 2 am each morning instead of staying the whole night.

The lack of fear is there because there is nothing to fear.

The key is that they never, ever find bigfoot. Not only should they never find bigfoot, they should never find any tangible evidence that a bigfoot exists. Hint at, show traces of possibilities, glimpses of psychosis, but never ever find the bigfoot.
Never ever find a boat to get off the island even though you are visited each week by people who do get off the island.

And should there ever be irrefutable evidence, deny, deny, deny. Play up the hypocrisy large. During the lead up, every single trace of evidence is proof of a bigfoot. When the evidence is clear, say that 'We can't be sure. We can't really trust this. We are going to need to see more proof before we believe this.' Because when they do find bigfoot, the show's over. As they say each week, some of they have been at this for 25 years. 25 years of failure. 25 years of waste and no ROI. 25 years of getting exactly what they want.