Phone book

I had been working with Kristen for 6 months. We worked great together and she told me all about her husband and her little daughter and her happy life and now she was leaving to take another job.

Perfect. She was a great worker and I would recommend her on Linked in.

I wished her well and told her to give me a call if she ever needed a reference for a job. Fact is, the team would struggle for awhile without her.

'Thanks. It was great working with you too. ' is what I expected her to say and what she did say in an email. But then she added:


'Oh and by the way. Why don't you come over and fuck me?'

Wait what? Did I just read that right? Was that some kind of subconscious thought I wasn't supposed to hear? How am I supposed to respond to that? You are supposed to say nothing, act like she never said it. Take it as a compliment and move on. Like a normal moral person does. Problem is that I don't have that moral capacity. Even though I found nothing remotely attractive about her, I found out where her next job was. Got in touch with her when she was separated, drove 13 hours to Noth Carolina and did what she wanted.

Three other married women later and the moral compass is still not working. The attraction to someone you know is with someone else is easy. It's not about whether they are obtainable or
not. That's never the goal.

In my office there was another woman who had been dating a married man for 12 years. She was now 29. The guy was now 44. Through the walls of the cubicles she laid out her story daily in detail.

Each day right before noon the tears would start. Sometimes just a few. Sometimes just one or two. Sometimes she left for the day. On the day he was killed in a car accident on his way to take her to lunch, she didn't cry at all. She couldn't go to the funeral. She couldn't get drunk at the wake. She wouldn't be getting any of his life insurance money. But most of all, she wouldn't be crying before noon anymore. On the day he was killed in a car accident, she laughed.

Possession is an ugly word. Is Marriage an ugly word? For many it does imply possession and entitlement. If that's marriage then yes it's ugly. Why can't people just enjoy being together? Live in separate houses, meet up when they feel like it with no pressure. Because people want that legal committment that says I am with you. If you are ever in the hospital, I will be there for you. If I need someone to make a life altering decision for my life that I can't make, I want you to make that for me. When tax time comes I want that deduction. When you want to leave, it's going to take some time because it should. People need an explanation even if they don't understand. When we go someplace, I want people to know that I am with not just someone, but you. When the car won't start, I'm calling you for a jump. When the kids come home from college, they are staying at our house and not spending it on the highway shuffle. You should have to want to work through the ennui. Through the boredom. Through the anger and fights to find the cocaine of life. The sweet spot that comes with sharing more than just a cup of coffee.

But back to my original thought is that there isn't a national known female figure that we can point to who holds a leading position, all by her own doing, not because she married someone powerful or is the girlfriend of a powerful leader or was married to a leader and that leader died so she filled a void. No there just isn't a woman leading the national discourse. There was one national leader in Madalyn Murray O'Hair, but I wouldn't really classify her organization in the same light. I'm talking about a uniter. A strong female that brings all sides together in their hatred of blacks, hispanics, asians and especially jews. The racist movement is soley partriarchial driven. The thoughts emerge from the men. They are progressed by men. They include women but only as an ncillary afterthought. Where is she? Where is this blonde female germanic power of the white race that can unite the separatists on her own? I don't believe she exists or ever will.

It also got me thinking about just what a life would be like if the white supremacists got their way and had a white's only society for themselves in this day an age. Let me break it down. They couldn't eat any food purchased at a supermarket because %100 percent of it is created by a mixing of the races. They can't watch tv - You know. The Jews. Listen to the radio - because of what's on it and where the radios are made. Certainly not a whites-only operation. Use the internet? It was created and is run by non-whites. Drive a car? Not if you want to go anywhere. Try finding one with only parts fully made by whites. You will have the first one. And a house or apartment? Non-whites had %100 percent contribution to your living quarters. I forgot clothing. They can't wear any store bought clothing. None of it is made by whites only.

So where does this leave our white's only society? Naked, living in the forest foraging for food
at all hours of the day and night, living under a shelter of sticks and trying to figure out a way to keep the predators at bay during the night because they can't find a rifle or pistol that was
only made by white's. A bleak existence but it's there for you. White's only though.